I’ve been having a conversation with Christ (via his representative, one of our Readers). And I’ve been trying do hard to show… no, to prove how good I am, what a sweet, sweet and very nice, humble and likable person I am. But I’ve come to the conclusion that he’s probably not gonna buy it.
Christ already told his Representative that I’m bad, and there’s nothing I can do to change it. So since I am not able to publish a genuine article today anyway, I might as well take the opportunity to be brave for once. I mean, really, really brave!
That’s right, I’m going to be brave and tell the truth, once and for all. And it’s not what you think, fellas, nope, I’m not the nicest and sweetest person you ever met, I wish I was, and I’ve been working hard at making myself look like I’m the sweetest and nicest person on earth. But…
The truth is: I’m the World’s Greatest Sinner!…
Yep, that’s right, plain and simple. I’m the greatest sinner in the world! – But I have to go, I’m running out of time here because I have a meeting with Obama or some other very important person in an hour, so I called for a little help on this here slightly embarrassing affair. I called Frank Zappa and asked him to tell Christ Representative the truth on my behalf.
And of course he said ‘Yes! Sure thing, pal, I’m flying over right away!’
‘Do you wanna borrow my plane while I sing the truth for the world to hear? I think Obama is waiting for you, and he’s thirsty but won’t start drinking until you’ve arrived!’
‘Ahh thank you, so much, Frank! You’re a pal! And thanks for singing the truth for me, while I got and drink my brains out for the evening with Obama. I really need it, because it would break my heart to even whisper the words “I’m the world’s greatest sinner!”, for really, all I want is to be good!’
‘I know, my friend!’, Frank Zappa said.
‘You do? You mean it? You know I want to be good?’
‘You are what you is!’, Frank replied.
‘No I’m not,’ I said. ‘IT’ is what it is!… Or what it was… or… what it isn’t, yes, that’s it… no? Oh well, go and read Christ Representative’s post, it’s right there! Or that become right where… or something!’…
And then I left. I owe Frank Zappa for telling the truth!… Enjoy!
Anon, Christ Representative, here’s another link to a great piece of music. It clarifies the deep wisdom of the words ‘It is what is!’, though slightly rephrased.
And you do know I’m just having good hearted fun, yes? Don’t take any of this serious. What you may take serious is in the post replies at the comment board!…